By Matt Linklater, Executive Program Director, The Sequoia System
You’ve probably heard of the “Yes-ladder”. The yes ladder is a process of getting small “incremental” yeses in order to get an overall yes to your main idea or suggestion. American diplomat Charles Thayer provides an excellent (and amusing) example of the “yes set” in action. Charles Thayer was negotiating with a German prison camp director at the outbreak of World War II. Thayer, whose mission was to deliver some belongings and supplies to a British vice-consul being held prisoner, recalled:
“He [the prison director] had the British vice-consul brought from his cell, and one by one I handed over items: pajamas, shirts, socks, and a toilet kit…. Then I produced a bottle of sherry, explaining that the vice-consul should have it served before his luncheon. The director said nothing, but took the bottle submissively. Next I produced a bottle of champagne which, I said, should be properly iced with the vice-consul’s dinner. The director shifted uneasily but remained silent. Next came a bottle of gin, another of vermouth, and a cocktail shaker. This, I explained, was for the vice-consul’s evening martini. Now, you take one part vermouth, ‘ I began, turning to the director, ‘and four parts of gin, add plenty of ice –‘ But I had reached the end of my tiny steps. Verdammt! the director exploded. ‘I am willing to serve sherry and champagne and even gin to this prisoner, but he can damn well mix his own martinis.'”
The lesson? This: If Thayer had presented all his requests at once, the prison director would undoubtedly have rejected the whole lot. However, by taking a yes-ladder approach (getting insignificant yeses and incrementally building up to more significant yeses) Thayer was able to get the prison director to agree to provisions he ordinarily would never have agreed to. You can take a similar approach in your quest to get agreement to your ideas and proposals. Start out by getting an easy yes. Something that’s easy for the other person to agree to. Then “snowball” your yeses from there. That’s how renowned diplomat Charles Thayer did it. And that’s how you can get faster and smoother agreements to your requests too.